Want to weigh.
“Ill be ok of I weigh won’t I? Because I’m in a good head space wanting to recover”
What’s the purpose of weighing? What do I want to know?
I want to know if I’ve lost weight. I feel lighter and skinnier and I want to see if I am according to the scales. Omg. How dumb is that? What does it matter what the scales say? Why does that need to determine whether I ‘feel’ lighter? If it does say I’m lighter I will get a sense of achievement and satisfaction in that. The weight loss will bring reward. And I don’t want to reward ED behaviors!!! I might be tempted to restrict more and get more rewarded OR swing the other way and eat more because I have lost weight so now I can.
Either way it may affect my eating pattern.
If it says I haven’t lost, I will be confused and disappointed and angry at myself. I may be tempted to restrict to ‘fix’ this or feel so hopeless at the situation that I’ll over eat or binge and then all the emotions recycle down that path too.
Either way it may affect how I eat and see myself.
The purpose of weighing is just to keep track of my bodies reaction to eating not to determine how I eat. So no, do not weigh now.
Tomorrow is weighing day and I’ll read this again just before I weigh to remind me of its purpose.
Now I see how much time this recovery thing takes; to have to stop and take so long with one thought, to then continue with the day.
The more I do this, the more automatic the helpful thoughts will be and the less time it will take.
Just keep it up now.